Locking down arrangements for the next school year becomes a little more complicated when you have separated from your partner.
Two separate households mean you may not be able to make decisions as easily as you did before. And if the separation was less than amicable, it may be that you and your former partner are not on the same page, and that getting decisions made about the children can be challenging.
Back-to-School 2022
The 2022 school year is nearly upon us. For things to go smoothly, you need good communication and a plan. Both parents must be in agreement on decisions and committed to fulfilling their responsibilities.
Here are three things you can do to get the school year off to a flying start.
1. Decide on a school, and have this discussion sooner rather than later
Separation means separate households, and with that brings change. Meanwhile, as kids get older, they will progress through the school system. Each of these things may require a review of where the children attend school.
Though it is confronting, have this discussion early. Because there are enrolment deadlines, give yourself ample time to get the right decision made, and don’t put it off.
Start by delivering a clear proposal to your co-parent as to your preferred school and the logistics surrounding that choice: how costs will be met, how the children will get to and from school, and how their extra-curricular activities will fit in there.
The parent receiving this information must try and be as objective as possible. There’s no point refusing a proposal just for the sake of saying ‘no’.
Be thoughtful about what the children need and what will be a practical, durable solution for everyone involved. After all, there’s no point in refusing a change if the existing schooling situation is not very practical in the post-separation environment.
Rather than jumping in with an answer, pause to give yourself time to think about the practical stuff. If remaining at an old school, ask yourself questions like, will the children spend more time in the car? What does that look like at peak hour? While your initial inclination may have been to refuse, after careful consideration, the proposed change may actually work better for the kids (and parents!).
Decisions about schooling are a matter of parental responsibility, so parents will need to discuss and agree on this. A decision of a parent made without the input of their co-parent can be challenged in Court. Give yourself time for this discussion to occur.
If you cannot agree, set up a session of Family Dispute Resolution (a private mediation facilitated by an expert) to identify options and isolate a mutually acceptable solution.
2. Be clear (and realistic) about costs
Prepping for a new school year comes with expenses. Your kids may need new school uniforms, books, stationery and sports gear; there might also be school fees to pay.
If you separated on amicable terms, you may already have an agreement (see: how to child support agreements work) on how to split these costs with the other parent. If you do not, compile a list of costs to your co-parent and ask for their commitment to pay a portion.
For the parent receiving that list, the first inclination may be to turn down a request for any contribution. But try to be realistic here – how much child support is paid? If it is a modest sum, it is unlikely to cover the core living costs of the children, let alone the costs of new uniforms and stationery.
Accordingly, think of the decision from the following angle – what will the children need, and how will you contribute to ensuring those needs are met? You do not want your children turning up to school on day one without the necessary items.
You can even agree to pay the stationery supplier directly if you want to be sure your contribution is being applied as you intend.
3. Be school-ready at each parent’s home
If the children are living between the two households, transporting school items between homes can be a pain – especially if someone forgets something and you have to make an extra trip to retrieve it.
To minimise this problem, discuss doubling up on things like core uniform items, sports clothing, lunch boxes and medication (if required), and sharing those costs so that each household has them. That will mean less time spent packing and reduce the chance of forgetting items.
An agreement about those things today can streamline things when life becomes busy during 2022.
We Can Help!
For challenging parenting decisions and parental agreements, be sure to contact one of our family lawyers. We’ve helped people from all walks of life through family law situations, and we can help you too.
BGM Family Lawyers is a Specialist Gold Coast Family Law firm providing expert family law advice and legal representation.
Call us on 1300 246 529 or contact us through our website – we can even see you remotely/electronically (MS Teams, Zoom, telephone).
